This comes from a Monty Python record, where the phrase "And now a massage from the Swedish Prime Minister…" followed by the sound of someone getting a massage, is peppered throughout. When I was a little baby DJ, I felt I needed some kind of verbal hook to set me apart. OK, so it’s not much of a hook, but you noticed it.

I borrowed this one from a former DJ at WFDU, who walked out of the station in the middle of his show never to return. I know, I was there. So in honor of him, I say his catch phrase until the day he comes back to pick up his wallet.

From the book "Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy." (And later the title of one of the sequels.) It was the dolphins’ last message to the human race before they left the Earth, in advance of its destruction by the Vogons. I say this in hopes that the dolphins will hear me and take me with them. Curiously, years after I started saying this, a psychic, who had never heard my radio show, told me that the dolphins were communicating directly to me. She said they were telling me to have fun. Hmmmmm.  (Douglas Adams passed away suddenly of a heart attack in May 2001. So long, Doug, and thanks for the line.)

I started playing this song after I had innumerable complaints about my playing of Techno and Industrial Music to the exclusion of so-called popular (at the time) grunge and alternative bands. The line "play with your own life, but don’t play with mine" captures my if-you-don’t-like-it-don’t-listen attitude. The phrase "the shape of things to come" is a focal point of my show. I play music that I feel is the soundtrack of the future. I’ve been told that the music I play will never catch on. Time and time again, I’ve proved them wrong.  This is not my original theme song. See below for a list of theme songs from the past.

Before quirky FBI Agent Fox Mulder on the "X-Files," there was quirky FBI Agent Dale Cooper on "Twin Peaks." Cooper was called to the town of Twin Peaks to solve the mystery of the murder of a girl named Laura Palmer. Everyone knew the killer’s name was some guy named BOB, but no one knew exactly where he was hiding. It was a very good show that died because after they finally caught BOB, everyone lost interest, including the show’s creator, David Lynch. Anyway, this sound bite is from a scene where Agent Cooper is interrogating the One Armed Man. I love the little poem, "He is BOB, Eager for fun. He wears a smile. Everybody run!" I use this as a warning to scare Barry Manilow  fans away.

The Prisoner was a really great TV show from the 60’s starring Patrick McGoohan as Number 6. He was a spy or secret agent who decided to quit his day job. He was captured by either the enemy or his own employers to find out the real reason why. This series was only 18 episodes long and turns up on public television and A&E sometimes. Watch it. The reason I use this music is that it is exactly 2 minutes and 45 seconds long, it allows me to say what I have to say at the end of the show and it’s cool music and it has neat sound effects.

There are two questions people ask me about the update music, I’ll answer them individually…

1. "What is that music?" – It’s called "Redstone," it’s from the album Metropolitan Suite by Synergy.

2. "Why don’t you play different update music each week, like you used to?" – I used to change the update music every week because I thought it would be a cool way to do it. It was fun. Then it got to be tiring because I would have to find a different piece to play each week. I’ve done the update for a long time. I’m glad I finally found a theme.

This will have to remain a mystery, because it’s just too complicated to explain.

This greeting had evolved over the years. I started saying it during my old overnight broadcasts in order to let people know that it was me and that they were tuned to the right (or wrong) station. It has since become a statement of purpose and a challenge to the listeners. I have just changed it to acknowledge the fact that we have web listeners as well. Here’s how it goes these days: "Hello world, it’s the Shape of Things to Come and you’re tuned to 89.1 wfdu or wfdu.fm ‘Where New Music Begins!’ I’m Bob Westphal, playing the best music on the radio, in any dimension of time or space… any universe, this one or parallel. So stay tuned…"

When I first got my AOL account, I wanted to stand out from the sea of Bobs in the world. So I am The One (and only) Bob. Strangely enough, I am the only "Bob" at wfdu. (There is a Rob, but "Robs" aren’t Bobs. Just ask any Bob.)

It was done on a Casio SK-1 keyboard. I sang "Bob" once into it and hit the demo key, thus the "Bob" song was born.

Jim is the DJ who does the show that follows mine. He arrives at the station 3 ½ to 4 hours before his show starts in order to stomp around the studio, grumble under his breath to no one in particular, cough loudly when my mike is open, complain about politicians, talk to me about cruddy horror movies I’ve never even heard of, (until they’re torn apart on Mystery Science Theater 3000) discuss supernatural phenomena, and generally scare me.

Here's some trivia from the old days of radio.

Percy Pavillion – "You’re an Extra, Baby!" – for when I was a fill-in DJ.

Many artists – "Almost Saturday Night" – A group named Bouncing Off Bob did a version of this song for my show that combined the Bay City Rollers’ "Saturday Night" with John Fogerty’s "Almost Saturday Night." It still brings a tear to my eye when I think about it. The artists whose version I played were: John Fogerty, Dave Edmunds, and Karla DeVito. Ricky Nelson also did a version but I never heard it.

The Monkees – "The Porpoise Song" – It fit with my "So long and thanks for all the fish" tag line. It’s also a beautiful song. It was also beautifully re-done by Bongwater.

The Cure – "Grinding Halt" – describes the way I felt at the end of each of my overnight shows.

Ghosty.

Urinating is a dirty habit.  Don't do it.

Ghosty.

Not Ghosty.  Sorry, I don't know what happened to her.

The inventor of FM RADIO!!!!  For more information on him, here's a link to a short article by Chris T. of WFMU. http://www.wfmu.org/LCD/GreatDJ/armstrong.html

The inventor of the Internet… Bwaa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!